How to Combat Your Self-Serving Bias
“You should never, ever fool anybody, and you are the easiest person to fool.”
- Richard Feynman
We, humans, have a knack for distorting our actions or the actions and behaviour of other people we care about to make them justifiable or understandable. This quite often can get us and others into trouble and can stagnate growth. Way too many people make excuses for their poor behaviour or performance and it’s important to be able to spot this in yourself and others. It turns out, that it’s just not that hard to do in theory.
I think it’s reasonable to say that you are generally a product of your environment and that you are somewhat a blend of the closest 5 or so people you associate with most frequently. That’s not to say that all 5 people are like you but that you probably pick up traits of each of those people. For good and bad. It goes without saying that if your friends, family or whoever act in a certain way then you probably will act in a similar way also. Again, for better or for worse.
This can obviously be a good thing if you knock around with diligent, hard-working curious people but probably won’t work out great for you if you hang around with deadbeats. I mean, each to their own and all that.
So, we have this pull from our environment but we have an even bigger gravitational force at work - our own self-serving bias.
“One of the hardest things for people to do is to objectively look down on themselves within their circumstances”
- Ray Dalio
Charlie Munger calls this the Tolstoy Effect where criminals find ways to justify their abhorrent behaviour or sometimes even just refuse to believe they committed the crime. Objectively looking at one’s own actions can often be quite difficult and requires a perspective that we all possess but seldom practice. We constantly find justifications for our own actions. Its protectionism. It’s easy. But, it also won’t grow your relationships, your career or you as a person of principles and values. In fact, it may grow your career, it just means you’ll probably be standing on people on the way up to the top! If that’s your thing, go ahead.
It makes sense that we have this self-serving bias programmed into us but we’ve evolved too quickly as a society in the last couple of hundred years and our evolution hasn’t caught up yet.
The utopian dream is a state where everybody treats everybody and everything with respect and care. That comes from objectively looking at one’s own actions and how they affect the bigger picture but that just doesn’t happen.
When you repeat a behaviour it becomes a habit. Once it’s a habit it’s part of an identity and once it’s part of an identity it can be very hard and uncomfortable to change that. This can be great for behaviours and habits you want to build but destructive for those you rather wouldn’t.
Objectivity stops you in your tracks and demands that you logically reason both the pros and cons of some action or behaviour on your part or others. If you’re a fan of Charlie Munger you will know you have to go further. You will know that you have a tendency to weigh more favourably things you like and under-weigh things you do not. Further still, fans of Darwin and Einstein deliberately look for evidence to disconfirm their pre-existing beliefs.
If you do not objectively notice your self-regard bias and just let repeat behaviour run away, particularly bad behaviour, then bad behaviour just turns into bad character.
When considering other people’s choices you also need to be aware of their self-serving bias and determine whether you believe they do or can objectively look at their own actions. Do they have an excuse for everything? Are they quick to get defensive or are they open to constructive criticism? When you’re in a team you naturally would want people to be able to objectively behave this way so you should do the same. It’s just that simple. If you want to see the change in other people then start with doing the right thing yourself.
In sports teams, you see the anti of the self-regard bias. Team members who do not pull their weight get sold or moved on. It’s an ick of people who watch sports for people to not work hard, to not help out teammates and to be selfish. Why would it be any different in any other culture?
We can’t expect everybody to be as open as to have a meritocratic culture but you can be open to this yourself. You can learn the traits and behaviours of both the people who do this and of those who don’t. If you are a part of a small team try to work with people who aren’t self-served. This isn’t easy and it requires you to be able to handle asking uncomfortable questions of yourself and others but again, always remember the famous words from Richard Feynman:
“You should never, ever fool anybody, and you are the easiest person to fool.”
Takeaways
Humans tend to justify their actions and sometimes others if it serves their self-interest. This is called self-serving bias or the Tolstoy effect.
You combat this by having objectivity in your own actions and behaviours as well as others.
Look for disconfirming evidence to particularly strong, existing beliefs or when you come out of a situation with particular more upside than one would expect.
Surround yourself at work and in your personal life with people who can objectively look at their own actions and behaviours.
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*Photo by Amine M'siouri : https://www.pexels.com/photo/grayscale-photo-of-human-hand-2050590/